3.05.2009

One post. 5 tissue papers. And, 1 litre of tears.

CAN I SCREAM OUT LOUD????

I MISS HOME!!! I MISS PAPA, MAMA AND MY SIS!!! I'm home sick.

Many times I wanted to cry. Thinking about home, family and friends. Everytime when I called home, I was at the verge of crying out loud. But I can't, cos they'll be worried about me. Yesterday was Mama's birthday. I wanted to use the Starhub international calling card to call home ytd morning. It couldn't connect!!!! I was panicking thinking that I have no credit on my Virgin prepaid. Well, then I managed to topup my credit online.

It was really good to hear a familiar voice. Mama picked up the phone. And there again, I couldn't speak properly. There was an invisble lump in my throat. The feeling that you'll have when you're controlling your tears... Yea, that was it. I wished her Happy Birthday and asked her what she was doing. The whole conversation was barely 2 minutes plus and we hung up after that. I haven't seen her for 1 mth. Papa too.

I used to find them really annoying. They grumbled about the smallest thing like how we left the fan on when we left the room, how I hung the clothes wrongly after a wash. Before I left, they used to tease me saying that no one will control me anymore when I'm here. I can do whatever I like. But now, I MISS THEM!!!! I've never missed someone so badly before.

Who made this clever decision of going to study abroad, spending my parents' hard earned money like no other business? ME! I am regretting a bit. Can't I study in Singapore like what you guys are doing?

My sister told me that my parents argued the other day. My mum wants to quit her job and my dad says that his job is not stable. I am a burden right now. Yes, I am. I need to find a cheaper house and scrimp my way through. Say that I'm a miser. Say that I also complain that things here are expensive. Whatever. I dont care now. I'm trying to minimise my spendings to $70 a week. That's 10 bucks a day. 'That's quite a lot!' You would say. But over here, a meal costs 10 bucks. So I think I'll survive on sushi rolls. Sushi rolls are really common here. I had one just now $1.90. Cheapest that I had so far. That's a 5 mins walk from school.

Com'on man, 1.5years is really short! I think I always had that in mind before I came here. But now, I'm dreading it. It's just the 4th day of school. When will this end?

I'm crossing my fingers. My eyes are really tired now cos I was brawling while typing this out.

One post. 5 tissue papers. And, 1 litre of tears.


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